Coming Unstuck Part 2

A sequel to the most comprehensive guide to getting out of sticky situations.

You're stuck with the bill
OK you've chosen to storm the Emin Pasha with this girl who could easily pass for your sister (you look disturbingly alike), of course with the insane hope of scoring later on. The tasty food you've consumed has connived with the bill to deny you the little credibility you might have achieved through the date. Avoid the drama that may ensue. You can avoid this altogether by uttering a single sentence the second the bill touches the table: 'do you want to split this evenly?' Tried it in fifth grade and it didn't work but since every body's in a recession, the brains may be AWOL making it worth the try!

A porn flick is stuck in your video player
One silly man i know once wrecked a $699 VCR so he wouldn't have to pay a $4 late fine on The Godfather. You can do the maths. A wiser or more patient man might have fixed the problem in 20 seconds. Just sitch the beast off and give it time to re-initialise or just visit fixer.com and get graphic detail on how to open it up. Or rather wreck the TV set, it gives you an extra day not to get caught!

Your zip is stuck
Yell out 'ouch' if it has anything to do with southerly skin. The rest is for you to figure out since they say experience teaches best! My painful remedy is to drop some hot wax on the zip to lubricate it.

You are stuck in the middle of a fight
Why would you be there anyway? But now that you are dont grab one bloke saying 'dont swing'. it is the worst thing you can do in a fight, because you're giving a clear shot to the other person, which your most likely to do anyway. Well just run for your life, update your insurance policy then call the medics to retrieve what may be left of the fighters'.